This time I have been gone for a while because I wanted to visit the red light district of the world. Well that shit didn't go over too smoothly. I don't speak a lick of whatever they speak in Thailand. Can you imagine trying to solicit a hooker that don't know how to communicate? It's like a blind man trying to pick his favorite Porno.
The legendary journey began with me wanted to get away to a place where tail is in an abundance. I mean it's the promise land for any heterosexual male's penis. This chicks f*ck for a living. It like it what they are born to do. Run free with their urges to do shit I would never recommend the American porn industry get involved in.
Sadly to my disbelief, this chicks faces were terrible. One girl had the nerves to have a missing hand. WTF. The pimps over there need to have some class about themselves seriously. At least from what I hear, the US hookers minus the everyday crack head have all functioning body parts. Take music video models for examples, they are nice looking hookers who might make a honest living as a cover up to what really happens on those shoots. Who am I to judge. I have issues too.
Back the point, I traveled over 3000 miles when I could have just went to the local Asian restaraunt and convinced the shy little hostess to come to the car with me. Trust me there are some pretty looking hostess Asian chicks that have a very unique accent. It reminds me of the scene from Dude Where's my car..... No an den.
Now that I am back. Prepare for the entertainment to continue.
-Uncle Booze
PS- I'm back for good. I have institutionalized mobile blogging in my life.
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