Straight No Chaser

Sometimes your boy S Beamin decides to make the weekend special, and by special i mean I get trashed. Well last Thursday I decided to make it a Straight No Chaser weekend, it was so viscous that I can only write about it now. The sickest part is I just started to piece together what went down. So the best thing to do is start from the beginning which was Friday at lunch, being S DOt a weekend like this has to fueled by some fire ass liquor. My choice was of course Belvedere IX. As I told yall earlier that IX be hittin, because it's 100 proof give. With the bottle in hand I went down the road of no return. I of course had to grab 24 buds to make sure I could do white trash saturday right. So Friday was a normal fun nights with fam as my Aunt from San Antonio who also likes the drink.

Saturday I woke up grabbed the Snuggie took a swig of the beer on the floor and the bottle of IX and tried to remember what happened the night before. I grabbed another beer and a few text and my day was planned. Step 1 kill 8 brews done with the ease, step 2 go to Gucci and get some new shades. This also happened without incident other than I got the last pair of glasses and old Slim Thug looking dude was pissed. On second thought that might have been Slim. So step 3 I had to meet up with my Boy Wise for Zieg Fest. Me being me I thought Zeig Fest was a beer carnival like Beer Fest in Tally where you go around drinking for free after cover charge, boy was I wrong.

The first thing that told me I fucked up was when Wise said he was waiting on his boys to pick up beer, why would they need beer at a beer fest? I said fuck it so we all jump in the 4 door family ride and start smashing road beers, next clue I had fucked up is when we pulled into Specs liquor. This is when I found out that I was headed to a country music festival, AWWWWW FUCK ME! Now I gotta get drunk so we all by Travelers of liquor to sneak in, being an asshole I get the big bottle so I can get at it.

When we get to the fest I found out it's hide liquor time now im about 16 beers deep so I've got no boot to stick booze in so down the front of my pants it goes. I know look like my dick has the most girth ever, but fuck it lets go.
Once inside I get more beer, I get more drunk and run into a chick I used to know from high school. I was a dick to this chick all through school, but now she's lookin aight so I setup the next weekend get together and im off. As per usual I slam the whiskey sharing with one of her friends and get loaded. After Zieg we get more drunk and I pass out on the couch.

Now here is where it gets bad I on Sunday it was tailgating time so on three hours of sleep I grab a 24 Wise grabs another 24 and we all head to the game. I proceed to get hammered on the light rail, I then get hammered at the tailgate next to the whole roasted pig, and continue drinking at the game. Supposedly the game was good, but I drank blacked out, and then passed out. I got out of the stadium and now I don't remember shit. Supposedly I stumbled around Wise's apartment building until security found me passed out in from of a door. I told him I was headed home, he took my keys and phone and called my DAD. I woke up on a couch parents there dragging me up three flights of stairs.

The next thing I know I wake up at my house with a beer in my hand and 4 hours until work starts. I of course make it to work hungover all to hell. My boss proceeds to make fun of me and tell me to lay low which I did. Three days later we all laughed about it and now im writing this. So tomorrow I have a devils night party, and then a kegger on Halloween. So it's high school chick friday, then Wise, crew, high school chick (again) and her crew. This is the life I live people it gets no better.

- S. Beamin
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