Thank You Planned Parenthood for making what might be the advertisement of the year. Yes, people they are not only helping to keep me from having a money grubbing seed too early, but they are also telling h*es to let me stick it in their butts. Oh yes people this type of greatness only comes around every so often and this is one of those times. Come to think of it all the commercials that are trying to protect me from having kids are hilarious. I think someone out there knows something about me and kids, because for the next five to ten years me and a lil S. Beamin is not a good combo.
Take for instance that kid up there. You know what I would have done I would have simply picked up a glass and shoved in the kid's mouth sideways, Goodfellas style. Those other parents looking around would have got their first lesson in Beamin's kid training. I have been seriously thinking about choking my kid when he's young to let him know I hold his life in my hands forever. It would be a 21st century fear of god thing, I think it could work.
This kid I don't mind that much, because he's getting in where he fits in. He has found that lil S. Beamin inside him and has taken advantage of this ho's weakness. Another thing, you know pops ain't mad about sh*t, because he is smashing way more than any married man I know. It's simple though people I don't need kids and if you're reading this you probably don't need kids. Why you ask, because any responsible person would have stopped reading this awhile ago.
- S. Beamin
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