I am a very cultured person that loves all ethnic foods. I have never eaten Indian food. I have heard rumors that Americans' stomachs are not strong enough for that sh*t. I believed it so, I do no think I would ever try that sh*t that gives you instantaneous irritable bow syndrome. Count me out. Just yesterday, I went to this all you can eat Chinese buffet........King Buffet aka "Your stomach will fear me later." Man did it do a number on me.
Before I knew it, I was in the restroom and one of the ladies came in to ask, "R's Yous Okay?" I replied, " Your food is a SPAWN OF LUCIFER." Then she said, "I not know what yous a mean." I said," Lady, let me be. Can't you hear I am busy in hear." I was literally in the restaurant's restroom for like 20 minutes contemplating whether or not I need to call the ambulance to rescue me from the abyss. I think my man Richard Pryor explains it best (listen below).
I have learned my lesson. Just because it is all you can eat, does not mean you can sit there for lunch and dinner. I know what you are thinking, but this particular buffet had a full bar. It is a recession people and it was a win win situation for me. To top things off, there was an abundance of crab legs. Anyone you know would have done the same thing. I just recommend that you line your stomach up with some grease and do not eat Taco Bell for Brunch like I did. We all know that you can't mix cultures like that; it must be done in a systematic order. Not sure how, but as I continue to mix them I will inform you.
-Uncle Booze
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