Ladies when I get you a drink don’t automatically think it’s because I’m trying to sleep with you. If I’m trying to sleep with you Ho I’ll tell you, because I don’t like to pussy foot around. More than likely, the reason I brought you a drink is one of two reasons. Reason one you are boring and/or a b*tch either way alcohol will make you more fun. It will take that broad stick you have in your @ss and if you’re lucky get it replaced by another type of wood. Two, it might even help you from looking like I sh*t in your birthday cake. I’m sorry honey you are never going to get a man with that permafrown on your face.
Now that you have your drink ,I hope you will get drunk so that I can bang your friends brains out; while you lay quietly in the backseat passed out. If not hopefully you’ll be drunk enough not to care that while I hit your friend from the back and I smash her face into your crotch. Trust me you’ll like it and more than likely thank me with a blowjob. See, I wasn’t actually trying to sleep with you just get you drunk.
- S. Beamin
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