This Summer Sucks

You know what this summer sucks. I seriously hate this sh*t. This is actually the first time in my entire life that I have not enjoyed a summer. It would be ok if it sucked for one reason, but this sh*t sucks all around. I mean I actually hate my life more today than I did in the dead of winter. That statement right there is some sick sh*t. This is supposed to be my oasis of chicks in bikinis, never ending kegs, and parties that run into each other with reckless abandon. Now, we will get into the h*ll that on earth that is this summer or as I call it the end to life itself.
First, lets start with the big problem; the fact that I’m not at home, but still in school. Yes, your hero is in Summer school trying to graduate from this dumb @ss thing called college. I never realized how bad it sucks to be in a college town when school is out of session. This place is dead as fu*k; like it’s truly a graveyard for fun. The abyss of all things good in the world.

Not only does it suck that I’m here, it sucks that I’m missing what I have to assume is a better time going on at home. Some people truly don’t understand how much fun I usually have when I go home for the summer. Lets start from the beginning........ that means kegs not just kegs, but I’m talking endless kegs. That means you go to the hockey arena and drink all day until Memorial Day. On Memorial Day, you go to a very nice annual party that has endless kegs. Then everyday is either kegs at someone’s house or in a bar.
That’s just kegs, lets not talk about chicks in bikinis running around my backyard, taking trips around the country for no reason, and spending the weekends at beach and lake houses.

Second it’s hot @ss fuck out here. Not only is it hot, it is hot for no reason. Back home at least, I can sit by my pool and drink a beer if it’s hot. Yeah I sit, tan, and drink. I get too hot, I get in my pool. If I get tired of that, I go into my fully equipped pool house cook a meal, and watch the satellite. Here I just get f*ckin heat, I have no pool, and my backyard is full of trees, which block the sun. Also, my kitchen is like 80 feet from any piece of sunlight, which makes my life inconvenient as f*ck, and lets not even get started on satellite.

So in general, life sucks, but you know what if I woke up tomorrow and was someone else I would end it, like suicide doors I kill myself. Why you ask after I just b*tched and moaned for a entire post well I’m S. Beamin and it doesn’t get much better than that.

- S. Beamin