She Pissed on Public Property

Last night was a sight I want to physically drill out my head. One....I tried to send this from my phone, but the application crashed right before I pressed the publish button. I was casually walking down the street after having a few brews at a local night spot. On the window ledge of a store was a curious looking young lady with her assumed to be male companion. This dude was a good guy and definitely took one for his own team (If that is even possible).

As we were walking, said young lady erupted like volcano. Their were several pissing eruptions from her genital area. It was like nothing I had ever seen before. I swear she was born with a fire hydrant for a "vaage". Just imagine a tsunami shooting out from under a chick's dress. Sure I've seen chicks pee before, on a f*cking toilet, but never in public on a sidewalk. If you want to know my thought process, please continue reading!

"WTF. Is that chick okay...OH. Maybe she had too much to drink. Well at least she got someone to help her......Dude did her water just break....NO..NO..NO....This chick just really took a piss without any reservations about it....That's have to be f*cking embarrassing. If that was a chick I was with I would act like I didn't know her. Like probably leave or some sh*t like that. Dude has to be embarrassed too. She just let the whole world know that she does not have any control over her urine. Please do not tell me she is going to pull out some kleenex from her purse to wipe. f she does, that would be classic. I wonder what was going on in both of their minds.........

Him: Girl hurry up and pee before Uncle Booze and his friends pass by.

Said Girl: Okay. I will make this quick. Wait it won't come out. Oh no they are too close and its too late. F*ck this is going to go down as my most embarrassing moment tonight. FYI thanks for convincing me to do this; you aren't getting any tonight!"

I didn't realize that it actually happened until I found myself voluntarily paying hopscotch over some random chick's urine. My friend that it would be nice to play off the ordeal be telling her she dropped her beer. That didn't play over well, she replied, " I think they know, f*ck you with your whack @ss." All we could do is laugh. It everything in my to convince him not to retaliate by bringing attention to misfortune. Quitely, I though, Yes b*tch we saw that aling with everyone walking behind us.

At this point, I began to think....What type of CHICK pisses on herself in public? Like what type of mother is she going to be? I pray for her this morning that she would reform from her wicked ways and find her true calling as the human fire hydrant. I also pray for her potential children......that they do develop morals about themselves and do not act primitive in public.

-Uncle Booze