Uncle Booze Discovers the Dollar Store

We are in a recession and I discovered a treasure chest. Everything in the entire store is a f*cking dollar. I couldn't believe it. I walked around stunned that someone has single handedly made everything in the store a buck. It even has groceries like that cheap store Aldi. The only thing that I refuse to use from the store are condoms. I didn't even bother looking for them and I wouldn't recommend you do. I am a Trojan man and will always be one.

I know that some of the things may seem generic, but they even have Hawaiian punch for a buck. That can be used in my favorite party drink Hunch Punch aka "I can't remember my name." I was in f*cking "awe" when I shopped in this place. You can even whip up meals with the treasures I found. Wal-mart cannot even compete with their prices.

-Uncle Booze